Satan, Santa, Milk Trucks, and a Rickety Ladder

When the weather gets cold, it's time to head for the warm depths of the underworld.

 One night in early winter our group of explorers visited four different sites. The exploration started immediately after work, when T-Roy and myself had some time to kill before the rest of the group met-up. We entered a run-of-the-mill drain and traveled up stream to a makeshift ladder extending approximately 15 feet to the continuation of it's course. It was constructed of two 2X2 rails with 1X2s for the rungs,each one fasted with a single nail extending no more than a half inch into the 2X2. There was no way either of us were climbing it, still we tried, backing down by the time we hit the third rung. With time running short we exited with a plan for a return trip and a proper ladder.

Osha approved 

Santa or Satan ?

  We met half of our group in Lavender Town and fueled up on burritos before connecting with our two guides for the evening. Our agenda was to explore Satan's and Santa's Cave. I had never been to either and was excited that my request, via, friend of a friend, back in the summer, was going to happen. Once inside I was beginning to question my enthusiasm, this cave was dirty. Not dirty like you would expect a cave, but dirty like fesses. There was an at-one-time enclosed sewage trough running through the first open room. This had a big hole smashed in it from which the sweet odor of gray water was enlightening the room. I poked my head in briefly and didn't really make out any turds, but like I said it was a quick look.

purple boot marks the way 

natural cave ?

  Moving on.... I 'm pretty sure the first part where we entered, was what is known as Santa's, the second section was Satan's proper, judging by pictures referenced in UE blogs and websites. This "cave" was just as dirty as the first, with the main tunnel having a very wet and soupy black floor. It didn't smell too bad, but I sure as hell wouldn't be eating any open faced turkey sandwiches down here. Off of the main tunnel were several branches running perpendicular. These branches looked much more like an actual cave, there was nothing man made about them. They were quite wet and muddy, which made me regret wearing less than the shittiest clothes I have. From our starting point the main tunnel pitched downward,as it did the black water got deeper. None of us were really in the mood for this type of adventure and it was agreed to turn back.  The main room, from which the cave gets it name, complete with a Satan's head effigy carved into the sandstone walls, evaded us on this night.

 The night was not over yet, we were just getting started. From Santa's we drove to Mahogany Town where our guides would show us the Milk Trucks. These caves/tunnels I was familiar with, but had never ventured deep enough to see the famed trucks half buried in sand. The system of tunnels were immense, occupying our time and holding our curiosity for a couple hours. Once we had seen enough we began to make our way back to the vehicles...the long way.

Going down 

mysterious 

  On the surface, our lack of motivation to climb a steep hill, and choice to walk a much longer and flatter route led us to one more surprise. I'll leave it at that and offer only a picture........ Happy exploring.

where are we anyway ?

Tour Guide

 Recently I was asked by a couple guys if I would let them know when the next sewer tour was happening. Like any other ride.......they happen when someone wants to go. After a few phone calls over the following days we had a day picked and a small crew put together for a tour. Along for the ride were the usual suspects Vandy and Best in Schow, the new guys included Crash, Dusty, and legendary shop owner Peaches.

Fat-Bikes ready to ride

  The six of us met around 6 pm at an undisclosed parking lot and rode to another undisclosed location to begin the real part of the ride. Best in Schow and myself choose this particular drain because it had been about a year since we had been there, it has a tricky entrance, and it would be new for Vandy as well as the others. Getting in via hand-line over deep water went smoothly and soon we were headed upstream.

heavenly 

 Best in Schow led the way while I took a slower pace at the back keeping an eye out for any new artwork since our last visit. The artist's have been busy, there were lots of new "paintings" to see which makes it interesting every time I come back.  On our way up stream we all noticed a faint odor of spray paint, and at the entrance there was a new piece of webbing tied off in a manner that would ease someones exit. There were also wet tracks made in the dry concrete floor alongside the subterranean river in which we were following. Someone else was down there for sure.

  The main feature of this drain is the helix, being on bikes makes short work of the effort it takes to get there, another reason I like to go slow...the ride lasts longer. Once at the helix we descended the 170 + stairs to the top and continued on down the pipe. It eventually narrows to a height in which a bike no longer can be ridden...this is where we turn around. The air smells of petroleum of some sort and I don't really care to spend much time there anyway. Crawling further down the tube looks boring as well. We never did see the "artist", but did find his/her stash of spray paint cans, dust mask and nitrile gloves all neatly kept in a plastic bag down a side chute. We surmised they made a hasty exit to the surface via a nearby manhole, as the thundering sound of six fat-bikes,(some with studded tires) came closer. On our way out we stopped briefly at the bottom of the helix and enjoyed some Captains Wafers I bought at the dollar store.

  We contemplated hitting another drain but everyone rode so fast they were all soaked. Disappointed with the thought of the night being over so soon, I had them agree to further tours at a later date. The exit went without incident, no one fell in the water and everyone rode back to the vehicles with a smile.